Surviving Water Festival In Myanmar on a Motorbike – Day 1

“Was I crazy?”, I asked myself as I put a rain cover over my day pack.

“No, I have to do this.”

I had a flight to Africa on the 18th of April which left me 5 days to get down to Yangon. Two of those days were going to be spent riding a motorbike from Muse to Pyin Oo Lwin. I had done the ride up from Pwin Oo Lwin to Namkham and it was some of the most challenging motorbike riding that I have ever done. What was the ride back going to be like?

I have motorbiked multiple areas in the Philippines, Vietnam, and Thailand but all of that was just practice for this. This was the Burma road. Where goods are transported to and from China. Where the road can go from brand new asphalt to dirt or gravel in a moment and only your 3M mask saves you from choking on the dust. Where everybody is passing each other (especially the slow semi’s) on mountain roads and the people are driving cars for left hand roads on a right hand road. There were a few times I was caught in some tight squeezes that were too close for comfort.

This time though I didn’t have to worry about the traffic. It was a 4 day national holiday. This time all I had to worry about was the water. It was Myanmar’s Water Festival to celebrate the New Year.

Now it wasn’t so much me getting wet that I was worried about. I had my Microsoft Surface Pro in my bag that I had to protect. And all I had to protect it starting out was a rain cover that was too big and didn’t cover the back of my bag. This will be an interesting ride.

I set off on the streets of Muse. The town was alight in trucks full of people with waterguns battling those on the streets with their buckets or hoses. People would play music and dance while either getting drenched or drenching others. This is the hottest time of the year (97F I saw during the late afternoon) so the water was the perfect way to cool off.

I was just an innocent passerby but that would not save me one bit. Being on a motorbike made me the perfect target and the combination of also being one of the only foreigners drew attention to me like a magnet. I put my mask on to try to disguise myself a little more and to protect my breathing from the dust.

All of this was a lot of fun. It was like being a kid again having a watergun or waterballoon fight in the middle of the summer. But this was a whole another level. Everybody was in on this. The whole time going through town I had a big smile on my face.

At first I thought I was pretty safe and that my setup was pretty good to protect my bag. I got drenched multipled times on my way out of town. When I stopped at the gas station one of the girls working dumped a bucket of water on me. She got me good! As retribution before I left I grabbed their bucket and got one of the girls back. I believe this was the one who got me but was unsure because she snuck up on me from behind.

On the way I was trying to air out the back of my bag when I realized there was a puddle of water that my rain cover was holding. The bottom of my bag was steeping in this. I pulled over and pulled everything out. My tablet was soaked on one of the edges. I took the plastic bag I was protecting my coat with (still unsure why I brought it, it was because I wasn’t sure of the temp at night in the hills) and put my laptop in it with the wet side facing up to air out. This would keep it safe if there were any new puddles. I repacked my bag and headed to the nearest café for some lunch and to air out my things.

Before I was letting people get me with the water. Now I was going to have to be more careful. It’s war now.

Choose your weapon

• Bucket
• Dish
• Hose
• Squirt gun
• Water tube
• Water balloon
• Water bottle

Defensive maneuvers

• Stealth mode – Sneak up so they do not notice you
• Super Speed – Go so fast they do not have time to get you
• Keep Your Distance – Do not get close enough to get hit
• Speed Change – Accelerate or decelerate so the water thrown is too early or too late (does not work for hose or squirt guns)
• Decoy – Let somebody else go first so they take the brunt of the water. This one depends on reload speed
• Foreign Charm – Some kids have not seen somebody that looks like me so they stare in awe while I drive by
• Reverse Psychology – Pretend like you want to get hit. Sometimes this will confuse attackers and they will let you go by (or they don’t want to waste water on you because you are already soaked…)

Now the newly formed militias have differing styles of weaponry, skill, and organization. You have your family militias, the neighborhood kids, the teenage friend group, and the lone wolfs. Some were so disorganized that I saw them all splashing each other while I drove unscathed by. In comparison, another group of neighborhood kids had a whistle to get everybody ready and all of them would fire in a line as you drove by. I got soaked from this group! The lone wolf is a tricky one because once they target you they will hunt you down until they get you with a big bucket full of water.

Beyond this you have to watch out for the tricks. The first trick was for one group to block the road so you have to slow down and then they soak you as you squeeze on by. Also, always be wary at the gas station. No where is safe! One lady filled up my tank but spilled some. She got some water and said she had to wash it off. I didn’t think much of it until after a few splashes on my bike she turned the dish to splash me. I dodged most of it but she winged me.

I wish I could’ve taken pictures of the joy in people’s faces as you sped on by. There is nothing more pure and fun than the look in people’s eyes as they drench an innocent motorbiker on his way south. It was beautiful.

The skill definitely varied from person to person. You could tell the people that have done this for awhile or have lots of practice due to their strategic location with many passersby. They would time everything perfectly so the water would hang in the air and you would motorbike right into it and get almost all of it. The areas where there were less people they were more often to misjudge your speed and miss. The reload speed matters a lot as well. Those with a water source such as a bucket next to them can refill almost instantly to attack the next person. If you refill off of a hose it takes time for the water to fill up and you have to fill one person in the group at a time. You can tell all the years of experience and practice people have had doing this.

I made it safe to Loshio with only getting drenched maybe over 20 times. It was hard to keep track but it was a lot. I thought most of the water would be in the big towns but it was the whole way. Wherever there were people there was a good chance you were going to come under attack. I was able to dodge a majority because I was worried about my computer so deployed some good defensive maneuvers. If I didn’t have my bag I would have let more of the kids hit me.

It was such a fun day and the roads were so much better without all of the trucks driving. I am excited for another day of this! So far my computer still works so I succeeded!